Tuesday, August 14, 2007


18" x 24"
acrylic on canvas

I once met this young named Chris. He was nineteen - plump with the freshness and naiveness of his youth. Like most young men of this age I’ve known, they'd either be full of life or full of grief. His was the latter.

He told me of his story, of how he has fallen in love with someone much older and much wiser in the ways of the world. He said, "I am from a poor family and I have nothing in this world for this man but my love for him. I love him so much. He means the world to me." I am trying to remember the words he said as much as I could... and I smiled.

I thought, "Ahh, gay-love... nothing more romantic, pristine and ideal as when pronouncements such as these are coming from the mouth of a beautiful youth smitten with affection and emotion for someone he wishes himself to be." But that's the sarcastic side of me speaking. I spoke with him further, thinking that in the end his true purpose will reveal itself.

He talked of other things he was willing to do for that man. He talked of someday working hard to be worthy of the other. He spoke of lofty ideas. My inner voice was telling me that I might even end up losing money buying a ladder high enough to reach what he said he'll build.

I asked him, "Will you follow him wherever he goes?"

"To the ends of the world if I have to", with conviction he muttered.

"What if he doesn't love you?"

"Then I shall forever love no one else", and a tear glinted on his eye.

Foolish as he is for an impossible love, I saw that many a lover like him are fools. His was for someone he can never have and yet he gives it. The cry of the insatiably hopeful (as all lovers are) is to give away much of himself, that even just a mere glance from the one he offers his emotion to is enough to soothe his aching soul. It's the cry of every singer of love songs, it's the wail of every lovesick fool.
"La Historia" is my song for that young man - in love and in pain for someone he wants to give himself to. It's my smile to his tear.


Eventually, nothing came out of that affair. Young and reckless, I hear Chris found himself tiptoeing into somebody else's bed and played around with his youth.

And the older man? Well, he went back home across the seas with his domestic partner of more than a decade.

It's a nice story.
august 5, 2005


atto aryo said...

Wow! Very beautiful illustrations! As to Chris, he'll later find his true love. One day ..

Kiks said...

We all get foolish, don't we? It just keeps getting stranger though if at the age of 35 and one still feels the way that Chris once did.

You write English as beautifully as you swirl your lines and fill them with color.

I rejoice in those who have what I don't.

Ebb Tide said...

You're not only a good artist but a good storyteller. What a colorful and whimsical painting to accompany your story!

palma tayona said...

@kiks: don't fret at being foolish when being in love, even at 35 years old. if one isn't foolish when in lovem then perhaps it won't be love at all, di ba? :-)

thank you too for your kind words.

palma tayona said...

@ebb : we all have stories to tell. some do it by words. some by pictures. some do it by gestures. no matter whatever way one does it, methinks life becomes interesting if there are more stories to tell. :-)


ruff nurse-du-jour said...

Oooh, the picturesque story of gay *first-love. It was refreshing to hear stories like these. It makes me feel invigorated and even more optimistic about love.

But then comes the peril of youth and stupidity. Who could blame Chris right? At that age, the word commitment is almost non-existent in his vocabulary. My say: raging hormones and bodily passion.

I rest my case. =)

Russ Ligtas said...

I say we leave chris alone and have him tell his story. The lucid "fool" tells it better in the end. And no story is exciting without one.=)Cheers to fools!

hxero said...

just dropping by... your art?.. really nice..

pepe M. said...

Ah Love!

Ive been into this relationship for more than 2 years now
and sometimes I feel, is this real! Cynical it may sound, but do gay relationship really
destined to be doomed?

Loveeeee tis site…
Link you ha?

palma tayona said...

@ ruff : Touché!

@ yas : ... and i lift my glass to fools. :-)

@ hxero : thank you for dropping by.

@ pepe m. : i love wallace. :-)

kevin said...

Thanks for stopping by my blog. Drop by anytime.

I love the picture of 'La historia de mi corazon-The history of my heart'. It has meaning and the picture relates to the words.

Wishing you a great day over there in The Phillipines.

Kev in NZ

Anonymous said...

Wow! Can I just say for a moment there, wow! I'm no art genius, but I see an early Picasso in your works. You're fabulous! Linking ya!

palma tayona said...

@ mark : picasso??? i won't go that far. thanks for linking

@ kev : i enjoyed reading your blog

palma tayona said...

perhaps he did find his place. somewhere in japan. if it is true, somebody who knows someone who told another one i know that he went there as a hosto.

anyway, you know how news go down the grapevine, either you end up with a rotten grape or a fine wine.

cb said...

I know a boy named Chris,too--- very well.

Joachim said...

The author is absolutely right, and there is no question.
weather in Paris | Huntsville real estate | flats to rent